Before you head off for your holiday office party, please groan along with this ode to holiday puns.
On the first day of bonus season
my supervisor sent to me:
12 Dwarves for Tossing
11 Padded Bills
10 Leads a Left
9 Bailout Lawsuits
8 ‘Issues With Bloomberg’
7 Hedge Fund Hot Dogs
6 “Sons and Daughtersâ€
5 Tommy John’s
4 Housing Booms
3 Twitter #Fails
2 Bitcoin Moguls
and a $13 billion settlement.
A look back on our reporting of the past week’s highs and lows in finance.
FRIDAY, DEC. 13
William Morris Poised to Be Highest Bidder for Sports Agency | As the auction for the global sports powerhouse IMG draws to a close, the Los Angeles-based talent agency William Morris Endeavor appears poised to submit the highest bid. DealBook »
Charter Prepares Takeover Offer for Time Warner Cable | Charter Communications is preparing to make an offer of less than $135 a share for Time Warner Cable, according to people briefed on the matter. DealBook »
THURSDAY, DEC. 12
A Surprise From Hilton: Big Profit for Blackstone | In the topsy-turvy world of private equity math, what at first glance looks like a multibillion-dollar loss can in fact be a huge gain. DealBook »
High & Low Finance: It’s Hard to Summon Sympathy for Big Banks | Big banks have gone from being viewed as national champions â€" proof of a country’s standing in the world â€" to being seen as a potential source of national disaster, writes Floyd Norris. DealBook »
$25 Million in New Financing for Coinbase | Andreessen Horowitz led a fund-raising round for a Bitcoin start-up in San Francisco. DealBook »
In Insurance, Treasury Urges More Clarity, More Rigor and More Oversight | The report called for a greater federal role in the regulation of insurance, particularly in areas like mortgage insurance, the collection and use of personal data to set prices, and the use of secretive entities known as captives to keep risks off the books of insurers. DealBook »
The Fevered Jungle of Wall Street Receives Visitors From Colder Climes | Kindergartners and financiers gathered at the Blackstone’s headquarters to meet animals from Sea World, the theme park that the firm took public. DealBook »
Bank of America to Pay $131.8 Million Penalty in Mortgage Deals | The settlement arises from a series of collateralized debt obligations that Merrill Lynch cobbled together and marketed. DealBook »
Malone’s Media Firm Bids for Rest of Dutch Cable Operator | Any potential deal for Ziggo, which could be worth more than 5 billion euros ($6.9 billion) would be the latest in a string of acquisitions in the European telecommunications and cable industry. DealBook »
WEDNESDAY, DEC. 11
Criminal Action Is Expected For JPMorgan in Madoff Case | JPMorgan Chase and federal authorities are nearing settlements over the bank’s ties to Bernard L. Madoff, striking tentative deals that would involve roughly $2 billion in penalties. The government will use a sizable portion of the money to compensate Mr. Madoff’s victims. DealBook »
Hilton Prices Initial Public Offering at $20 | Hilton will become the latest company backed by a private equity shop to pursue an I.P.O. DealBook »
Boies Schiller Again Pays Associates Generous Bonuses | The law firm is paying bonuses of as much as $300,000 to some of its associates, with the average young lawyer taking home an additional $85,000. DealBook »
JPMorgan Plans to Unveil a Program for Job Skills | The five-year, $250 million initiative is focused on filling the skills gaps in some of the largest United States and European job markets, including New York, Chicago, Los Angeles and London. DealBook »
Royal Bank of Scotland in $100 Million Settlement | Civil investigations accused former employees of helping conceal transactions involving customers from Iran, Sudan and other nations subject to international sanctions for about a decade. DealBook »
The Trade: Soothing Words on ‘Too Big to Fail,’ but With Little Meaning | Simply asserting that the financial system becomes safer as regulators complete Dodd-Frank rules does not make it so, writes Jesse Eisinger of ProPublica. DealBook »
Falling Club Faces Doubter in the Market | The British hedge fund manager Crispin Odey is making a $5 million bet that Manchester United’s New York-listed shares are destined for a poor showing. DealBook »
TUESDAY, DEC. 10
At the Finish Line on the Volcker Rule | Interviews pull back a curtain on the private negotiations to show how the regulators completed a rule that has divided Wall Street and Washington. DealBook »
News Analysis: ‘Long and Arduous Process’ to Ban a Single Wall Street Activity | Regulators will have to remain extremely vigilant, and understand highly complex trading books, if they are to properly enforce the rule. DealBook »
Activist Hedge Fund Seeks Higher Bid in Pharmaceutical Merger | Paul Singer’s fund urged McKesson to sweeten its deal to acquire the Germany’s Celesio. DealBook »
Lucky Brand Apparel Sold to Private Equity Firm for $225 Million | Mid- to high-end fashion brands are finding themselves as acquisition targets. DealBook »
MONDAY, DEC. 9
Rule That Curbs Bank Risk-Taking Nears Approval | Wall Street is entering an uncertain new era as the rule that has come to symbolize Washington’s efforts to rein in financial risk-taking finally takes hold. DealBook »
U.S. Ends Bailout of G.M., Selling Last Shares of Stock | The sale closes a tumultuous chapter in the history of the American auto industry, and allows the nation’s largest automaker to continue its comeback free from the stigma of being known as “Government Motors.†DealBook »
Cerberus Regrouping in Bid to Sell Gun Maker | Efforts to sell the Freedom Group, which produced the Bushmaster rifle that Adam Lanza used in his deadly school shooting in Connecticut, have been hamstrung by the public furor that prompted the auction in the first place. DealBook »
Sysco to Buy Rival US Foods in Deal Valued at $3.5 Billion | The deal unites the two biggest food distributors in the country, solidifying Sysco’s position as the reigning giant in an already consolidated industry. DealBook »
DealBook Column: How Mandela Shifted Views on Freedom of Markets | Nelson Mandela’s extraordinary legacy overshadowed his complicated journey to support free markets and a free economy, writes Andrew Ross Sorkin. DealBook »
For Natural Adversary of the Bargaining Table, Labor Holds a Banquet | Private equity firms and steelworkers have shown a willingness to cooperate. DealBook »
SUNDAY, DEC. 8
Near Vote, Volcker Rule Weathering New Attacks | Lobbyists for Wall Street banks and business trade groups issued thinly veiled threats about challenging the Volcker Rule in court. DealBook »
Ex-Trader at SAC Seeks Testimony Cohen Gave | Steven A. Cohen is not likely to testify at the insider trading trial of Mathew Martoma, but Mr. Martoma wants to use some of the testimony that Mr. Cohen gave in a related investigation. DealBook »
Activist Investor Plans to Increase Pressure on Bob Evans | The hedge fund Sandell Asset Management is waging only one of a growing number of battles in the food industry. DealBook »
Gun Maker’s Owner to Offer a Way Out to Its Investors | Cerberus Capital Management is planning to give other investors in the Freedom Group a way to cash out as an attempt to sell it has stalled. DealBook »
WEEK IN VERSE
We’re dedicating the Grammy nominations to Wall Street.
‘Royals’ | To Bitcoin investors, who are betting big on the fantasy of the digital currency. YouTube »
‘Locked Out Of Heaven’ | To JPMorgan Chase, whose troubles with regulators don’t seem to have an end. YouTube »
‘Thrift Shop’ | To Boies Schiller, whose associates can certainly afford the finest threads. YouTube »
‘Same Love’ | To Goldman Sachs, which was one the first big banks recognized for promoting gay rights. YouTube »
‘Roar’ | To Blackstone, the private equity firm that really loves animals. YouTube »
