How to Propose the Pogue Way

Two weeks ago, I proposed. To the sweetest, funniest, wisest woman I've ever known.

I wanted my children to feel a part of this life-changing event, so one night last spring, I asked them for their suggestions for a fantastic proposal. My two teenagers informed me that the most epic and unforgettable proposal would be a fake movie trailer. It would start out like any other romantic-comedy preview, but gradually reveal itself to be a thinly veiled version of our love story.

I persuaded the movie theater at a summer resort to slip it in among the real movie previews, on a night when both Nicki's family and mine were in the audience. You can watch the finished product here.

After its “premiere,” people kept asking if I'd be posting it online so they could show their friends. With Nicki's encouragement, I did - and to my astonishment, the video went viral. It also generated a lot of questions.

Here, then, are the answers.< /p>

Q. Nice job on Pogue's Proposal. But not all of us have thousands of dollars to spend on making full-blown movies for our girlfriends.

A. I had to laugh at this one. If you only knew how cheaply that movie was made! The whole thing was shot in two days, with a huge amount of planning but practically no budget.

If it looks professional, that's a testament to the skill of Zach Kuperstein, the recent N.Y.U. film school grad I hired as cameraman.

He used an ordinary Canon S.L.R. to record the video. That's it - a still camera. No Hollywood gear, no key grips or best boys. We used special lighting in only one shot, and it was the cheapie video light I wrote about last year.

I also paid the two stars - both talented Broadway actors - but all the others involved were friends and neighbors who just wanted to help out. I wrote, directed and edited the movie, and I gave myself a huge discount.

Q. Wait a minute - what about the opening shot? You clea rly had a crane rig for that.

A. Nope. Zach stood on the roof of my Prius with his tripod as I drove slowly along the street. The resulting footage was a little bumpy from the pavement, but the Analyze for Stabilization feature in Final Cut Pro X smoothed it out quite nicely.

For nighttime scenes, Zach duct-taped blankets over the windows. For the scene where “I” am hosting a Nova TV show, look closely: the “cameraman” is actually holding a 1985 VHS camcorder I found in the basement.

We didn't have a dolly, either. To film the jogging scene, Zach tied his tripod into the back of my car, like this:

As the car rolled, I sat next to him and held the microphone “boom” - a broom handle with an audio recorder duct-taped to the end of it. (For the second day of shooting, I hired a sound man with an actual boom.)

Q. In the YouTube version, we can see your girlfriend's reaction as she watches, picture-in-picture style. How could she not know she was being filmed?

A. I hid a Nikon S.L.R. in a ficus plant just beneath the screen. After the movie began, a friend moved a Sony NEX-5, on a tripod, to the back of the aisle, to record the actual proposal moment. And my daughter sat behind and across from Nicki, filming her from the side with an old Flip camera.

I was hoping that, despite the darkness and lack of rehearsal, one of those cameras would capture something usable.

Incredibly, all three did.

Q. At the end, you stand up in front of the movie audience and pop the question - and the characters on the screen seem to react. When she says “yes,” for example, they all start cheering. How could you be sure that the timing of her live reaction would work with what you'd already filmed?

A. I couldn't!

The onscreen characters interact with the live me four times. First, they encourage me to get out of my seat and bring Nicki to the “stage.” Second, when I lose my nerve, they ho ot for me to continue. Third, they gasp when I bring out the ring. And finally, they explode into cheers when Nicki says yes.

To film the on-screen sequence, I had the cast look out at a smiley face I'd taped to the tripod leg - a stunt double for where I'd be standing in the actual theater. To make sure their interruptions came at the right times, the cast reacted to the audio playback of my speech, which I had pre-recorded on my phone.

Then I spent a week rehearsing my live speech with that video, so my own timing would be right. As long as Nicki didn't say anything while I spoke, I would be golden.

Until, that is, I actually asked the question. At that point, timing was no longer in my control.

I wasn't actually worried that she'd say no; she'd dropped a few sweet hints over the months. The real problem was that I had left her enough time to say exactly one syllable.

What if she made a joke (“I'll have to think about it!”)? What if she we re too overcome to speak? What if I was too overcome to speak?

In all of those cases, the music would swell anyway, the actors would cheer inappropriately - and I'd look like the world's biggest idiot.

I worried about that moment for weeks. There was nothing I could do but hope.

As you can see in the video, my prayers were answered. Yes, I had left Nicki the time to utter one syllable - but that's all she needed.

She said “YES!”